Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
