You were right. It hurts to walk today.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
