how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
