I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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