i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Let's paint friendship bongs
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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