you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize
