alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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