we have officially lost it.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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