i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
