I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
