She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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