I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize