Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
