There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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