4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Randomize
