Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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