you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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