I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
YAS. BRING CRAB.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
