seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
