If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
