I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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