Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Randomize
