How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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