She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
