we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Randomize
