Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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