I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
