can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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