So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
