you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
