i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
