i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
