New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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