before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize