I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize