okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize