they said they heard you say put it in my butt
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
