When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I just gift wrapped bread.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Randomize