He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
