Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
