my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
