i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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