Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize