Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
