apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Randomize
