At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
