you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Randomize