But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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