We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
