ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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