I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Randomize
