operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
